thirty-nine
On Saturday, I hit the 39 week mark and on Sunday "celebrated" Mother's Day.
I use the term celebrating loosely because I had been dreading Sunday. I have been crazy emotional the past several days, and that didn't help,
but I did not want to celebrate Mother's Day without a baby in my arms.
but I did not want to celebrate Mother's Day without a baby in my arms.
And everyone was so thoughtful and lovely and sent cards and texts and included me in the day that I thought would mean so much to me,
and who am I kidding...I probably would have been sad if no one would have said Happy Mother's Day to me.
(Do not underestimate me when I say I'm emotional!)
and who am I kidding...I probably would have been sad if no one would have said Happy Mother's Day to me.
(Do not underestimate me when I say I'm emotional!)
But it certainly wasn't how I expected to celebrate my first Mother's Day.
I'm not sure it even counts. Not without Pat.
I don't really want it to. Because I couldn't get out of my funk and was sad all day,
and how am I supposed to feel about a Mother's Day without hugs and cuddles from the baby? It's not the same.
and how am I supposed to feel about a Mother's Day without hugs and cuddles from the baby? It's not the same.
Parts of the day were lovely!
Church with Andrew, a beautiful morning and breakfast outside. Flowers from my neighbor. Yoga. A nap.
Dinner with friends. A really good chocolate dessert. An almost clean house.
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Dinner with friends. A really good chocolate dessert. An almost clean house.
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But it didn't feel right.
I don't feel like a mom.
Yet.
Also, Pat:
Please decide to come sooner than later so I don't have to listen to people and their innappropriate comments and opinions. Since when did it become okay to say whatever pops into your head?
Things I can't wait to not hear again:
1. When are you due? Saturday. Really?! You are so small. Is the baby okay?
Yes, thank you for your judgement that I'm starving myself to have an unhealthy baby.
Can't be too big, can't be big enough.
2. Maybe your baby will be late and you can get more done here!
From someone at work who shall remain nameless, but I would imagine you can all guess who...
Okay, bad mood will be over NOW!
Please decide to come sooner than later so I don't have to listen to people and their innappropriate comments and opinions. Since when did it become okay to say whatever pops into your head?
Things I can't wait to not hear again:
1. When are you due? Saturday. Really?! You are so small. Is the baby okay?
Yes, thank you for your judgement that I'm starving myself to have an unhealthy baby.
Can't be too big, can't be big enough.
2. Maybe your baby will be late and you can get more done here!
From someone at work who shall remain nameless, but I would imagine you can all guess who...
Okay, bad mood will be over NOW!
people said i was too small when i was preggers, too and i had the same reaction as you. silly people, my daughter is perfect and your "pat" will be too! :)
ReplyDeleteLove that skirt! Where is it from?
ReplyDeleteYou look beautiful and your baby will be just as beautiful too :) Hope you liked my card!! I also will keep my fingers crossed for you that this baby makes an appearance sooner rather than later!! It's almost time!!
ReplyDeleteI had someone ask me TWICE--"Are you sure everything is okay? Shouldn't you be bigger by now?" She's lucky she didn't get a pop in the nose! Anyway, I think you look fantastic...and Pat is going to be perfect! Any day now! Love you!
ReplyDeleteI hope you are feeling better. Emotions when you are pregnant are the craziest thing. And just so you know people also comment when you are huge (lance) and when they think you won't make it to your due date, three months away by how low baby is sitting (lacey).
ReplyDelete