All Boy

11.4.14 Ali Moore 2 Comments

If you've ever wondered what people mean when they say a little boy is "all boy" they are really saying this:

That 'said' little boy cannot and will not sit still.  If he accidentally does sit still, as soon as he realizes he has accidentally been still, he must make up for the stillness with extra oomph and zest in the next moment.  He cannot just throw a ball.  He must throw it with gusto, a step and all of his weight behind it.  He also cannot just throw balls.  He must throw toys, and books, and sticks, and rocks, and food, and clothes, and grass, and mulch,
and sand, and anything that he can pick up. 

When he gets excited, it shows on his face, in his arm pumps, foot stomps, and teeth grits. 

It's not enough to conquer climbing up or down the stairs by himself.  He also has to jump off the last step.  Or the curb.  Or the bed.  Or a chair. 

And that jump must be mastered so it is practiced every time we open the door to the garage to get in the car.  Or the front door to get the mail. 
Or the back door to go outside.  

And might as well practice whenever he wants because door knobs and door handles are no longer detterants, but just a slight delay tactic.

And when he gets into the garage, he may as well open the dog food container and try a few pieces.  Again. 
Because maybe it tastes better today?  Compared to yesterday.  Or this morning.  Or five minutes ago.

And surely the dog doesn't mind.  Nor does he mind when the "all boy" boy tackles him.  Or lays on him.  Or tries to ride him like a horse.  Or a bull.

Probably a bull.  

Because bulls are like cows.  And he likes cows.  And tractors.  And trucks.  And any construction vehicle that slightly resembles a tractor or a truck.  And he must call out their names as we are driving down the road, and he spots one.  And then requests more.  

Can't find a tractor for the "all boy" boy?  Doesn't matter.
 If you're lucky, it's trash day, and that is his favorite day of the week when that beep-beep-beep trash truck backs up to the can in your driveway,
hoists it up, dumps it, and places it back in one final sweep.  Byeeeeeee, trash truck.  Until next week.

The "all boy" boy likes to tell you when you're driving "up high" as you cross a bridge or shouts "down!" when you exit the highway.  And it's best when done with shoes pulled off in the car, but even better with a sock on the hand because surely that's where those are meant to belong.

Ooooh, the "all boy" boy loves to be outside.  And since doors are no longer keeping him in, he'll go outside whenever he pleases.  With no shoes on. 
Or socks.  Or even pants.  And he'll squeal when he gets caught because for that little boy, that's just half the fun. 

The "all boy" boy turns washing hands in the sink into a fun game of splashing water on himself.  And you.  And the countertop.  And the cabinets.  And probably the floor.  And he might let you dry his hands for an all-time record of 3.3 seconds until he dashes off, fast as his little legs can take him,
arms pumping to pick up speed.

To go where?

Crawling onto the couch to flop on his sister.  Diving into his tepee to hide.  Or maybe just over to his cars where he will watch them race down the ramp, one-by-one, until that becomes too predictable, and he wonders, what happens if I throw them one-by-one against the brick fireplace?  Do they all bounce off that far?  Do they all roll once they hit the ground?  Oh, that one didn't fall completely off the ledge...better push it down with the others. 

The "all boy" boy loves to fling his entire body against a mountain of pillows on your bed.  And says "hannnn?" when he wants you to hold his hand and leads you to where he wants to play and jerks you down to the floor with him to "paaaaay" (play).  And usually that means playing trucks and making truck noises and making trucks crash and
making trucks fall apart and putting trucks back together. 

The "all boy" boy doesn't cuddle much, but sure wants a hug if someone else is getting one and will come running across the room yelling "huuuuuuuh? for a hug.  If you're really lucky, the "all boy" boy will even lay his head on your shoulder for a full two seconds during his hug.  And you'll breath in his "all boy" boy scent, and feel his soft hair and listen to his easy breath and wish that moment would last just a second more.   

If you've ever wondered what people mean when they say a little boy is "all boy" it's likely you don't have a little boy.  And if you do, and your little boy is "all boy" you probably just nodded along, and then smiled because your little "all boy" boy is the best workout, best tag-a-long, best adventurer,
best little boy you've ever loved with your whole heart. 

And goodness your "all boy" boy is surely exhausting and demanding and rough and tough and physical.  But he's exactly as he's meant to be. 

And he's yours.


  1. Goodness I have this exact "all boy" who will be 2 in July just in time for his new brother to arrive in July who he will be sure to teach his ways to! I'm in for it!!!!